Category: Moronic

Want to get free food, after a long fight, at a fast-food place? Try to pay for your food with a two-dollar bill. It’s an old story, and some rumors say it’s urban legend, but if Snopes deems it “Undetermined”, that’s good enough for me.

The Business Software Alliance (aka the BSA) has far too much time on their hands. The group is one of the leading fighters of software piracy, but they’re a bunch of morons. This quote from this Register story is great: “The Business Software Alliance has pulled off an astonishing anti-piracy coup, identifying a major European university as a distribution hub for… OpenOffice.org.”

For those who don’t know, OpenOffice is an Open-Source (read: free) office suite with many of the same features of Microsoft’s Office suite. Anybody can freely download and distribute it.

The automated anti-piracy bots discovered this “infringing content” after staring at it for a few months, wondering what the heck it was. The FTP’s site owner was e-mailed, and hilarity ensued.

Federal investigators are looking into what happened to a peanut butter sandwich, taken from the break room. I don’t know what’s more disturbing: That somebody had to write up this report, or that somebody actually reported the theft to police.

I just got a phone call from the local owner’s association (which is like the governing body of sorts for this little resort community I work in). They called to report that the renters who just left from one our units left a small bag of cans on the curb (we don’t have curbside recycling here). So instead of just throwing the little bag of cans into his car and getting 5-cents a pop, he called us (from the scene, mind you), and wanted our maintenance folks to come out there and pick them up.

And these are the people in charge here?

I like baseball and everything, but this proves even more to me that baseball players are over-paid pansies. Full Story.

Gotta love those frivolous lawsuits. From Obscure Store:

Andrew Burnett , who was convicted of flinging a dog into traffic during a fit of road rage three years ago, is suing the dead dog’s former owner and the San Jose Mercury News for allegedly causing him mental anguish, post-traumatic stress disorder and other woes. The newspaper’s lawyer says: “This is pretty much the definition of a frivolous lawsuit.”

The magician said he got the idea while lying in a bathtub thinking of US celebrity street magician David Blaine, who spent 62 hours inside a big ice cube in New York’s Times Square last November. What a moron.

I had written before of “Dell dude Steve’s” pot-smoking habits. Well, now the New York Sun is reporting that the pot bust was really a blessing. Quoted: “I’m done with the Dell stuff. I wasn’t being taken seriously as an actor, I was having a hard time getting proper auditions. I’m a little [angry] at how Dell handled it, but I feel done with the commercials. I learned a lesson I needed to learn. It’s me; people can accept it or not. It’s a part of life.”

What a moron.

I generally don’t post stuff like this, but I just thought this guy was such a moron that I had to post it. Full story at the Smoking Gun:

Memo to pastors everywhere: If you plan on trolling the Internet for young male consorts, use something other than the AOL address you hand out to parishioners. Because a little thing called “Google” now makes it easy to match private pursuits with public personas. Oh, and think twice about including a full-frontal shot in your online personal ads (that tends to annoy church elders and upset the flock).

And according to this chart, Oregon is the 5th highest in the nation. Luckily I was able to find it for below the state average last night, but the $1.71 I paid is still obscene. Luckily AAA and the FTC are looking into it. Thankfully I get 38 miles-per-gallon in my old Honda, but my 50-miles per day commute add up quick. Fuel cell cars like this can’t become a reality soon enough.