Category: Funny

The answer depends on who you ask…

George Bush’s Answer:

We don’t really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

Ralph Nader’s Answer:

The chicken’s habitat on the original side of the road had been pollutedby unchecked industrialist greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on other side of the road because it was crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.

Pat Buchanan’s Answer:

To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

Funny stuff. Thanks to Ken for the link.

Symphony buddy Nate sent me this site. The entries are great: “1972: Steve Jobs and Steve Wozniack get stoned out of their minds and build a computer that costs a fortune and runs no software. “Everyone will want one of these!”, says Jobs.” “1981: Bill Gates embarks on heroic and lifelong quest to piss off every person in America.” “1997: Scam e-mails replace oil as the chief export of Nigeria.” Great Read!

While it’s been posted in the Oregonian, Portland is now receiving national attention for its dillema. In 10 days, this city plans to revisit the moment 100 years ago that President Theodore Roosevelt rode into town in a horse-drawn carriage, gave a rousing speech about the great pioneers of the Pacific Northwest and put a copper box into the cornerstone of a towering monument to Lewis and Clark. The president’s great-grandson, Theodore Roosevelt IV, plans to read the same speech, stand on the same hill in what is now Washington Park and open the old box, a time capsule filled with relics of American life in 1903.

The problem? Nobody can find the box. Anywhere. Researchers are looking all over, reading historical documents, and coming up with nothing. And obviously Portland is freaking out about it.

This is religion-bashing humor, so have a sense of humor folks, but this is a little bit of commercial parody that, to quote the site, “we’re probably all going to hell for.”

4,524 according to the guys who did it. Link from Fark.

No, I’m not making the domain up. It’s a very funny site, and anybody who’s been in a long-term relationship can relate to many of the stupid fights that are there.

If you go out tonight and have a bit too much to drink, remember there is a right way and a wrong way to hurl.

There’s a giant Kermit the Frog atop Jim Henson studios, and it stares all day at Crazy Girls Exotic Strip Club across the street. Full Story (basically just a brief mention, but something I didn’t know about) from Fark.

A couple weeks back I posted links to some dang funny videos showing a slightly stout kidding dancing around doing Star Wars-like maneuvers. The site the originally hosted the videos (and the 2.3 terabytes of traffic that came with it) have not only figured out who the kids was, but where the video came from. Full Story.

This is a great story about how you can become the ultimate slacker. Great read, and full of tips and pictures.