From Ruminate.com:
I have a very high tolerance to alcohol. The problem is that I always get drunk long before I reach it.
I wanted to try that Jared guy’s “Subway diet,” but since I don’t live near a Subway, I had to improvise. Eight months later, I’m sad to report that the “McDonald’s Filet O’ Fish Extra Value Meal diet” has thus far been, well, spectacularly unsuccessful.
I wish human beings had the power to regenerate lost appendages. But not if that flab of skin that used to hang from my elbow counts as an appendage. I couldn’t bear to think of having to sand *that* thing off again.
My social life is like a Jet Ski. I pop out with it every now and then and try not to kill anyone.