After the failure of our birth control method and my girlfriend's subsequent pregnancy, the absurdity of it all hit me: Why do white people even *try* to use the rhythm method?
Our guide in Africa warned us that he had just spotted a leopard. I told him to quit clowning around, that leopards are spotted at birth. Three hundred stitches later, I realized the magnitude of my error.
As I swept up the latest round of shards, I began to wonder if vending machines were the best way to sell ceramic figurines.
I used to think that eating a package of Oreos before I went to the dentist was a pretty funny joke to play on the hygienist. Then I realized that with a little ingenuity, I could play the same joke on my gynecologist!
Ever wonder why they spend so much money recycling paper? Why not just simply photocopy a blank sheet over and over and over again?