I’ve Never Been Prouder To Be An American

The Nathan’s Famous Hot Dog Eating Competition has been won with a world-record setting performance by an American after Japan has dominated this event for the last decade.

Note that the headline of this post is sarcasm. I don’t know how many hot dogs were consumed during this event, but in the amount of time this competition was held, I’m sure more than a few malnourished children around the world died of starvation. Granted, a hot dog is probably not the best food for them, but it’s better than nothing.

It’s Time For My Own Personal Hell

As I’ve mentioned many, many, many, many times before, I pretty much hate the 4th of July. I’m all for celebrating our independence, but since I live where I can see the annual Burning Of The Butte (aka our local fireworks show) from my living room, our neighborhood becomes a war zone for the week before, the day of, and the week after the Fourth. Since fireworks went on sale last week, it’s been non-stop booming and banging with flaming projectiles flying through the sky (most of which are illegal in Oregon). I even saw one guy down the street who had set fire to a stump in his front yard and was lighting fireworks with it.

As I type this (and it’s 11:40 right now), I can still hear bottle rockets flying over my house. And today’s only the third of the month — it’s only going to get worse tomorrow.

Now just so folks who don’t live here understand, I live in a desert. A dry, hot, mostly moisture-free, high altitude, mountainous desert. We get snow in the winter, but our actual annual precipitation is very low. Which means we have a lot of dry wood and trees that will cause fires to burn of control quite rapidly. We’ve already had one fire destroyed this week because of illegal fireworks, and I worry that mine might be next because of some drunken moron down the street who decided it’d be a great idea to shoot projectiles out of their mouth, right at my house (yes, that has happened, and no, unfortunately Darwin didn’t win that battle). I’m thinking I might just keep my sprinklers on all night.

So enjoy the Fourth safely, everybody (I’ll be at work, so you’ll undoubtedly hear from me on the holiday). And if anybody has to deal with me on Thursday, I apologize in advance as I’ll be tired as hell.

Worst Job Ever

Watch this until the end — it’s worth it (language a bit NSFW).

Why I Love Oregon

We’re probably the only state where lap dances are protected by the constitution.

Video Dump

Some videos for you all to enjoy. Mostly so I don’t have them sitting in my inbox anymore…(videos after the jump).

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Office Time-Killers

If you’re looking to accomplish as little as possible on Monday, be sure to check these out:

Now excuse me while I lose some more sleep playing these so hopefully I’ll be sick of them tomorrow and won’t want to actually want to play them all day. Really.

And speaking of games, did you know they used to hide video games in the grooves of LPs (those are those big plastic black disks for you young’uns out there)?

I Might Get Arrested For This

I frequently hold my daughters’ hands when we’re outside or walking somewhere. They actually ask to hold my hands.

But apparently that’s something sexual predators do, and I could be reported for it.

I love it how the good parents get picked on and jackass parents like these morons are still allowed to procreate.

Attach a Camera To Random Things

Like a package or a cat.

Random Science

A few interesting stories for science/number/research geeks:

Any Recommendations On Local Car Dealers?

I’ve about had it with my Dodge Grand Caravan. It was a good deal at the time, but it’s just been one thing after another that needs to be fixed, and it’s time to trade it in. I want to get a different minivan, preferably a foreign one (Toyota or Honda), as Consumer Reports just rates them so much better. I certainly can’t afford a new car so I’m going to be shopping the used market, but would prefer to buy from a dealer so I could possibly get a warranty of some sort and flexible financing.

Obviously the RNR people all seem to hate Auto Warehouse, but has anybody had anything good or bad to say about any local dealers?