Humor has Returned to Southwest Airlines

I’ve personally never flown Southwest (that I can remember), so I’ve never experienced this, but rumor has it they’ve got some pretty funny flight attendants. After Sept. 11, they stopped being funny for a bit, but the humor has returned. From this Wall Street Journal article, some quotes:

  • “OK, people, it’s open seating, just like at church — saints up front, sinners in back,”
  • “Remember, this isn’t a furniture store. You’re only renting this seat for an hour”
  • “Please place your seatback, tray table and intern in the full upright and locked position.”
  • In the unlikely event of a cabin depressurization, “please secure your mask and then decide which child you like better.”
  • “If you smoke in this airplane, the FAA will fine you $2,000 [pause] and at those prices, you might as well fly Delta!”
  • “Everyone on the plane’s left side, toward the terminal, put your faces in the window and smile so our competitors can see what a full flight looks like.”

    I think I need to start flying that airline.

  • Comments

    Todd says:

    The flight attendants ARE that funny on SW flights! I’ve flown several, and have actually heard some of those… (I’m wondering if they’re scripted, cuz the ones I heard were pretty much exactly that).
    On of my favourites:
    “OK people, get your tush in a cush so we can push!”

    Leigh says:

    yea SW airlines is a trip… i went on a flight without any knowledge of the humorous experience it might be… throughout the flight several cracks were made, and as we were landing the pilot let out a loud “wOOOah BESSIE!” and of course.. as we exited we were bid farewell with a lovely (to the tune of Barney’s ‘i love you’)
    We love you!
    You love us!
    We’re much faster than a bus,
    We hope you’ll come back for our hospitality,
    Marry one of us and you’ll fly free!

    cea wall says:

    Shortly after takeoff the pilot said over the intercom:
    ‘and tonight, the dinner menu is a choice of lamb with sping asparagus, or chateaubriand with russet tomatoes and a salad. Oh WAIT! That was last night’s menu. Tonight, you have a choice of chicken, or ravioli. Sorry ’bout that”

    Brendan says:

    Here’s another one:
    “In case the captian decides to have a pool party, please use one of the four exits; we’ll be right behind you with the beer & peanuts. If the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from above your seat. Pull on the mask to start the flow of…oxygen.”