Month: October 2011

OK, so we all know that I’m kind of “meh” about the whole Halloween thing (see my canned veggies labels or my concrete filled pumpkin ideas), but my family and kids all enjoys the day immensely, so I do my best to not be a party pooper. So with that in mind, here are a few so-bad-they’re-funny Halloween jokes from Barney (share your favorites in the comments):

What’s a monster’s favorite play?

Romeo and Ghouliet

What do you get when you cross Bambi with a ghost?

Bamboo

What’s do you call a haunted chicken?

A poultry-geist

Why do mummies make excellent spies?

They’re good at keeping things under wraps

What kind of monster is safe to put in the washing machine?

A wash and wear wolf

What do you get when you divide the diameter of a jack-o-lantern by its

circumference?

Pumpkin Pi

Why do ghouls and demons hang out together?

Because demons are a ghoul’s best friend!

What happened to the guy who couldn’t keep up payments to his exorcist?

He was repossessed.

A family member just go a job at Starbucks (after paying the paychecks of at least a few of their employees with her coffee habit), and decided to celebrate by carving her pumpkin appropriately:

Speaking of pumpkins, the largest pumpkin of the year received an amazing carving job.

Have has just chaotic the last couple months, and work is just draining me. Here are some fun links and videos to make up for it.

• Teenage Mutant Ninja Noses.
• Not that anybody was really paying a huge amount of attention to QR Codes, but now you have one more reason to ignore them.
• Maxing out your dropbox referrals.
• Rate everything on Jotly, where everything about your life is exciting to everyone (hilarious parody site).
• For the popular music buffs: The Billboard Wayback Machine.
• A reddit discussion asked whether you could destroy the entire Roman Empire during the reign of Augustus if you traveled back in time with a modern U.S. Marine infantry battalion? Great discussion ensued, and now it’s getting a movie deal.
• The Argos Catalogue from 1976 is a fascinating look back.
• If you’re wondering what the Occupy Wall Street movement is all about, these infographics and data will help you sort it out.
• People are notoriously quiet on the London tube. Here is one man’s quest to strike up some conversations.
• If anybody’s looking to buy me a gift this holiday season, this camera would be acceptable (the body is $6800 — seriously, if somebody’s going to blow that kind of money on me, I’ve got some debt that I’d rather have disappear first).
• Siri is a neat little toy, but she says some random stuff.
• Fun story on data overload in MS Exchange (speaking of data overload, ever heard of a Zip bomb?)
• 20 Useful Windows Registry Hacks.
• The YouTube Insult Generator (might be handy for some of the videos below).
• The Lifehacker Workout: Exercise for Normal People.
• Playing Day Of Defeat as a photographer can bring out some interesting photos.
• Take the Lollipop — I dare you.
• If you’re looking to calibrate your fancy HDTV, this may help.

Keep reading for videos…

(more…)

• A world without mosquitoes wouldn’t necessarily be a bad place.
• Leave it to some nerd to analyze the mathmatics on the blackboards of porn movies (safe for work, don’t worry).
• Time-zone database gets taken down thanks to threat of lawuit, but thankfully gets rebooted.
• Steve Jobs Was Always Kind To Me (Or, Regrets of An A**hole).
• May have linked to this before, but it bears mentioning again: fascinating map of submarine cables.
• MS Paint is actually more powerful than you think.
• An amazing way to celebrate a birthday, by collecting decades of memories.
• The birds and the bees, Dr. Suess-style: Now That You’re Big.
• Handy little tutorial to view mobile web sites in your Windows system tray.
• If I ever get an Android tablet, this is the first keyboard I’m installing: the Hacker’s Keyboard.
• The Wadsworth Constant (which become famous quick) should be the default on every YouTube video. Basically, a guy on reddit always opens YouTube videos and immediately punches the slider about 30% forward. That skips the crap in 99% of the videos out there and save a ton of time. An engineer at YouTube liked the idea so much, they implemented it. Just append “&wadsworth=1” to any YouTube URL, like so.

Just wanted to get these out of my way before I head out of town this weekend.

• Gamers solve molecular puzzle that baffled scientists.
• DIY Portable Wedding Photo Booth (looking at this for another project, non-wedding related).
• Ken Jennings is awesome, and you can help him write his new book.
• Frozen solid, but this hard drive still works.
• Why You Should Not Go To Medical School.
• What good developers should know about sending e-mail.
• Some ways you can earn money in your sleep.
• Inside the World’s Largest Embassy (here’s a hint: It’s in Iraq).
• An amazing nine-year journey of a rookie artist.
• Google and SolarCity work to make Solar Power Affordable.
• Zach Braff answers your questions.
• Woot CEO Matt Rutledge starts a new business, Netflix/Qwikster-style.
• If you do mobile development at all, this table of HTML5 support in mobile browsers will need to be bookmarked.
• Looking to make an Android phone a little more “old blind grandma”-friendly? BIG Launcher might be just the ticket.
• This is a really handy script to automate a lot of computer repair and clean-up tasks.
• Need map icons? Here you go.
• Use the Internet to investigate your next date, coworker, or friend, without being creepy.
• Seven-year-olds say the darndest things.
• Is anybody else see the same type of things in the most popular infographics.
• The 21 Greatest SEO Myths of the Modern World.
• Create a state of chaos in your town.
• Updated list of Microsoft’s Best Free Downloads (lots of good tools on there).
• Need to inventory all your DVDs and such? This app might help, allowing yuo to scan everything with your phone to a separate program.
• Everything is better when it’s said in llama.
• Google Wallet, hacked to run on more phones.
• 10 Ways to Turn Your Retired Gadgets into something useful.
• ColorBox is another lightbox plugin for jQuery, but this one is really lightweight compared to others out there (which is why I’m going to use it on some projects).
• Did you know you could hyphenate in Firefox and Safari? Me neither. Here’s a way to do it on other browsers.
• Interesting discussion on using font-embedded icons instead of sprites.
• Tabpress looks like a simple way to create custom tabs on your Facebook page. Will be trying it out on my day-job pages.
• Worried about somebody stealing your PS3? Setup a dummy PS3 with a GPS tracker.
• I’ve been going through all my ripped DVDs and trying to remove duplicate audio tracks (as I mistakenly had a stereo track plus an AC3/multi-channel track). MKVToolnix (specifically, the mkvmerge program) and Yamb have been able to simple take care of my MKV and MP4 files (respectively) and knock some bits of space off the sizes of those files.