UtterlyBoring.com is produced by Jake Ortman (e-mail, resume), a 30-year-old dad, percussionist, freelance Web designer, consultant and jack-of-all-trades computer geek, living in Bend, Oregon. He created this so that his expensive journalism and technology degree isn't getting totally wasted. In addition to editing this site in his free time, he is the IT Director and Ad Designer at both Sunray and Discover Sunriver. He has LinkedIn, MySpace, Facebook profiles if you're trying to stalk him.
Opinions and comments on this site are the opinions of the author, not the author's employer, family, friends or pets.
This site is powered by Movable Type and is hosted by orty.com. Internet connection provided by Bend BroadBand. Since December 1st, 2002, there have been 5269 entries. Visitors to this blog have posted 16543 comments.
If you're reading this, you have too much time on your hands.
White motherfuckers been pretending they dwarfs and killing all kinds of motherfucking dragons for days. That shit is old motherfucking news. I mean, everybody know that a pasty-face like pretending that they some shit that they ain't never gonna be, like a wizard or a motherfucking elf, or a white rapper that don't start his shit with "and I'm here to say" in the first line. Well, now all you white motherfuckers got something else you could pretend to be. Introducing MTV's Virtual Laguna Beach.
This is basically an opportunity for all you motherfucking shut-in white people to stop playing around like you a god damn Viking, and start acting like you a faggot ass pastel polo shirt wearing white motherfucker that live near the beach and don't gotta pay to get they dick sucked. Yeah, the subject matter is faggy as all get out, but if you gotta be white and you gotta pretend you something else, why not pretend that you somebody that ain't greasy in a motherfucking basement? I mean, fuck a Sim and fuck them Orcs too.
Oh and believe a nigga: this shit is not motherfucking fake. They actually beta testing this game right the fuck now and you could even play it for free. You could sign up and pick what the fuck you wanna look like, which is fine if you ain't black. I mean, any goddamn game that you gotta pick what the fuck you look like got like 50,000 variations of white motherfuckers, 30 sleepyheads, and 2 shitty ass black dudes.