Ruminations for the day

I bit the bullet and added ClubRum to the list of mailing lists that I'm a paying supporter (currently, the Langa List is the other). The daily ClubRum mailings are a riot, and I'll certainly be renewing. Especially when these good ones come across the list:

I sure got a lot of strange looks, carrying a dead zebra, a rotting antelope and a suitcase full of rancid prairie dogs. That's the last time I try to board an airplane with more than two carrion items.
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I can think of no better reason to treat my fellow human beings with kindness than that the human condition is already fraught with so much suffering and injustice. I sure as hell hope someone else can think of a better one, though, or I'm gonna kick myself for being such a wimpy-ass do-gooder.
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I wish I had a dollar for every time I've woken up naked and hung over next to a monkey. Then I'd have a dollar *and* one helluva story to tell the grandkids.
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(and from their filthy list)
I had a dream that Britney Spears rubbed her breasts in my face and Jennifer Lopez gave me head while Salma Hayek sucked my toes and the Olsen twins videotaped everything. I would have kept dreaming it, too, if I hadn't set off the smoke detector.

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